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My boyfriend overcome depression

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No one teaches us how to navigate a relationship when mental illness or depression enters the equation. I recently read a Washington Post article by a woman whose relationship was torn apart while she and her partner tried to deal with his depression. Last year when I plunged into a depressive episode during our relationship, my partner was at a loss. He had never dealt with this and wanted so badly to help, but had no idea what to do. Sure we hit bumps along the road, but in the end I felt loved, supported, and understood in a way I never had before during a depressive episode, and he felt like he knew what was going on—a big deal in this situation—and was equipped to deal with it. It operates on the notion that the not-depressed partner is wonderful and selfless for standing by the partner with depression.

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: 5 Tips for Dating with a Mental Illness - Kati Morton

Content:
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How to Help a Depressed Friend or Partner

Dear Therapist: My Boyfriend’s Depression Is Making Me Question Our Future Together

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It can be quite challenging to help a loved one through depression. When this person is your boyfriend, you will feel your own emotional pain. Your boyfriend may be angry and lash out at you often. He may even try to withdraw from you completely. Learn how to assist your boyfriend through this trying time while still taking time out to care for yourself, too. While it can be challenging to help your boyfriend through depression, the first step is to have an honest conversation with him.

As your boyfriend works on his depression, encourage him to seek professional help. While supporting your boyfriend may feel like your primary concern, make sure to take care of yourself too by finding a support group or seeking out friends and family to confide in. Did this summary help you? Yes No. Log in Facebook. No account yet? Create an account. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. By using our site, you agree to our cookie policy.

Article Edit. Learn why people trust wikiHow. Tasha is affiliated with the Dwight D. There are 20 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. Explore this Article Having a Candid Discussion.

Taking Care of Yourself. Tips and Warnings. Related Articles. Article Summary. Part 1 of Recognize his symptoms. The ways men experience depression are slightly different than women. If you notice most or all of the following symptoms, your boyfriend may be suffering from depression.

Share your concerns. Go to him in a non-confrontational way and ask to talk. Some ways to start a conversation may include: "I have been feeling concerned about you over the past few weeks" or "I've noticed some differences in your behavior lately, and I want to talk to you.

This could come off as accusatory and cause him to shut down. It is natural for men with depression to be argumentative or angry. However, if you approach him in a loving, nonjudgmental manner, he may be willing to listen. It can be easy to come off as blaming or judging your boyfriend if you are not careful with your language.

Plus, you're avoiding your friends. I would like us to talk about ways we can get you feeling better. Listen to him and affirm his feelings. Strive to help him open up by letting him know that he is safe to share his feelings with you.

If he talks to you, listen attentively, making sure to nod or respond reassuringly. Afterwards, summarize what he said and repeat it back to him to show you were listening. Thank you for sharing that with me. I am sorry that you have to go through this, but I will do whatever I can to help you. Ask safety-related questions.

If your boyfriend is struggling with depression, he may have thoughts of hurting himself. You might ask the following questions: [6] X Research source Are you having thoughts of hurting yourself? Have you ever tried to commit suicide in the past? What plan do you have for ending your life?

What means do you have to hurt yourself? Get your suicidal boyfriend emergency assistance. Have someone remove any items that could potentially be used as a weapon. And make sure someone stays with him at all times. Express your readiness to support him. A depressed person may feel incapable of asking for help, no matter how badly he requires it. Extend a helping hand to your boyfriend by asking what how you can support him, how you can help him relieve stress, and whether you can run errands or take him somewhere.

With that being said, asking something like "How can I be there for you right now? Help him seek treatment for depression. Depression is a treatable illness quite similar to many medical conditions. With proper professional assistance your boyfriend can enjoy improvements in his mood and functioning. Part 2 of Suggest a physical activity to do together.

In addition to medication or psychotherapy, physical exercise can be very effective at improving the mental health states of people with depression. Staying active provides mood-enhancing chemicals called endorphins that can make your boyfriend feel better about himself. It can also provide a positive distraction from some of the negative thoughts and feelings he has that contribute to his mood. Suggestions might include new fitness class in the gym, a home workout program, running in the park, or participating in group sports.

Ensure he is eating healthy foods. Help him discover ways to manage stress. Firstly, ask him to write down all the things in his life that are causing him stress or anxiety. Then, work together to brainstorm ways you can reduce or eliminate these stressors.

Next, create a list of go-to strategies he can incorporate into his daily life to relax and keep stress at bay. Recommend he keep a mood journal.

Creating a mood chart can help your boyfriend get in touch with his feelings, and become more aware of how he feels from day to day. People with depression can track their sleeping and eating habits to look for patterns that lead to negative mood states. Your boyfriend can also write down his thought patterns and feelings each day to spot fluctuations in his mood. Help him connect with others.

Both men and women who are dealing with depression tend to withdraw socially. Unfortunately, maintaining social connections can actually help depressed persons reduce feelings of isolation and fight depression.

Or, talk to his existing friends and encourage them to get together. Steer clear of enabling your boyfriend. Yes, your boyfriend will have to recover in his own time and in his own way. However, you may worry that you are enabling him to continue the cycle of depression. If you are doing so much for your boyfriend that it removes any potential for him to gather the strength to do for himself, then you might need to back off. Try being supportive instead of enabling. Your boyfriend wants you to show empathy and love , but he does not need for you to take all the responsibility of healing away from him.

Part 3 of Don't take your boyfriend's depression personally. Remember that depression is a complex illness, and you can't control the way your boyfriend feels. It's natural to feel helpless or pain when you see him hurting. Still, you should not take what he's going through as a sign that you are lacking something, or that you aren't a great girlfriend.

Strive to stick to your regular routine as much as possible, making sure that you are fulfilling your own responsibilities at work, school, or home. Also, set clear limits of what you can and cannot do for him. You may feel guilty, but, know that you are not responsible for making him feel better. Trying to do too much might jeopardize your own health and well-being. No matter how much you may love and care for your boyfriend, you alone cannot help him.

Aim to just be there, and offer your assistance and support wherever needed. Your boyfriend will have to overcome depression in his own time. Find a support system. Supporting him during this time may cause you to put your own emotions aside. This is hard for the both of you, and you need to seek support as well.

7 ways to help if your boyfriend is suffering from mental health problems

Editor's Note: Every Monday, Lori Gottlieb answers questions from readers about their problems, big and small. Have a question? Email her at dear. My boyfriend and I are in our early 20s, and we recently moved in together after being in a long-distance relationship for four years. I can barely get a normal conversation.

It can be quite challenging to help a loved one through depression. When this person is your boyfriend, you will feel your own emotional pain. Your boyfriend may be angry and lash out at you often.

Find out more about cookies and your privacy in our policy. Read about how Sara dealt with the overwhelming experience of helping her depressed boyfriend, and the lessons she learnt in the process. Seeing a loved one go through a hard time always impacts you in some way or another. You watch them hang their head and cry a little, and you pat them awkwardly on the back and tell them it will be okay, because you feel sad for them and want them to be okay. But you then carry on with your own life.

Depression in Men

Many people find themselves supporting a partner with depression at some point in their lives. The support of family and friends can play an important role in the treatment of mental health conditions. Depression is a condition that affects around 16 million adults in the United States each year. Depression can take its toll on relationships and may cause loved ones to feel helpless, frustrated, or fearful. In this article, we explore ways in which people can support a partner with depression in their journey toward recovery. Asking about symptoms also shows the person that their partner is interested in their feelings and experiences. Avoid asking questions that seem judgmental or place blame on the person with depression.

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In this series of blogs, we explore the realities of anxiety and depression through the lens of real-world first-person narratives from anonymous teens. What else can we learn about these issues? How can we work to overcome them together? Watching someone you love struggle with depression is incredibly difficult.

If you are in a relationship with someone who has depression, you are likely struggling with a mix of emotions and hosts of questions. What's it really like to feel depressed?

Depression builds walls around people and between people. When someone you love has been dragged inside those walls, there can be a distance between you both that feels relentless. Not in the way you both want to be anyway. The symptoms of depression exist on a spectrum.

How to support a partner with depression

As men, we like to think of ourselves as strong and in control of our emotions. When we feel hopeless or overwhelmed by despair we often deny it or try to cover it up. But depression is a common problem that affects many of us at some point in our lives, not a sign of emotional weakness or a failing of masculinity. It affects millions of men of all ages and backgrounds, as well as those who care about them—spouses, partners, friends, and family.

During Men's Health Week, here's how you can help if a man in your life is suffering with depression and anxiety. But what should you do if your boyfriend or husband is suffering from mental health problems? A key warning sign that your boyfriend is dealing with depression or anxiety is him shutting down communication. Not every conversation has to be about how he is feeling, as that can feel claustrophobic. When your boyfriend recognises that you can communicate without any pressure, he may confide in you more often.

What To Do When Your Boyfriend Is Depressed

Standing on the sidelines when a partner battles depression can feel like a helpless experience. You might feel confused, frustrated, and overwhelmed. You are not alone. Depression is an isolating illness that can negatively impact relationships and leave loved ones feeling helpless and afraid. The mood in major depression is often described as sad, hopeless, discouraged, or feeling down, but it can also include persistent anger. Angry outbursts and blaming others is common. Social withdrawal and lack of interest or pleasure are common among depressed people.

Feb 13, - When he is going through a bout of depression, it isn't always easy to understand what you should do. When someone that you care about is.

These forums are a place where you can ask other young people advice on dealing with tough times and share your advice on what has worked for you. Please remember that it does not replace professional advice. Join the online community Login to post. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. In that time we have lived and travelled together, and even gone engagement ring shopping.

Tips for Coping With Depression in a Relationship

Karen S. She no longer enjoyed her favorite activities, preferring to spend weekends sleeping in and watching TV. Their sex life was nonexistent. If you experience five or more symptoms for at least two weeks, you could have clinical depression, also known as major depression.

You love your boyfriend very much, and you want to always be there for him. When he is going through a bout of depression, it isn't always easy to understand what you should do. When someone that you care about is having a tough time, it's normal to want to be able to snap them out of it. Depression is not always a simple matter, though.

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