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Looking for girlfriend > Asians > How to help your boyfriend find a job

How to help your boyfriend find a job

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We have known one another for about ten years dating on and off, taking a four year break at one point. We are compatible on many levels, but there is one thing that continues to turn me off from ten years ago to now and that is his lack of ambition to be successful professionally. I find the sexiest thing about a man is his intelligence, and no matter if a person is well read or not, a great deal of intelligence comes from professional life experience. I should be happy to have a man who loves me and I can trust. I think everyone here can feel your pain.

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Advice on Getting a Man to Get a Job

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We have known one another for about ten years dating on and off, taking a four year break at one point. We are compatible on many levels, but there is one thing that continues to turn me off from ten years ago to now and that is his lack of ambition to be successful professionally. I find the sexiest thing about a man is his intelligence, and no matter if a person is well read or not, a great deal of intelligence comes from professional life experience.

I should be happy to have a man who loves me and I can trust. I think everyone here can feel your pain. In such circumstances, there are no decisions to be made. Which means the world is grey, not black and white.

This is the calculus of dating. Which is why giving advice on such individual matters is somewhere between impossible and pointless. Someone told me recently that women expect men to fulfill ALL of their needs, which sets them up for failure. They want men to fulfill the role of their best girlfriend and their rock solid Marlboro Man simultaneously. We can compartmentalize. Thus, you have to make hard choices. I get the joy of sophistication.

The ability to quote Proust pales in comparison with the person who will drive you to your chemo treatments in thirty years. So, back to the original question: are compatibility and kindness more important than worldliness and ambition? But there are ambitious people who are kind as well. And it would be easy to tell you to dump your guy and seek one of these guys out. The thing is that most good qualities often come with bad qualities as well.

The ambitious guy may work 70 hours a week. The sophisticated guy may be a know-it-all and a snob. I would encourage you to look long and hard at what really matters, CJ, and how hard it is to find it. And I meant it — I never really met anyone with whom I was super-compatible. Someone younger. Someone more accomplished. Someone more well-read. Is there someone like that out there?

Intellectual stimulation matters. Money definitely matters. Cj run for your life….. CJ sorry if this is an old post. I had a co worker. But she was very young.

About to turn She seemed to have felt that when he quit his career in baseball, that she was his rebound. Maybee possibly it was fate. You might have to sometimes choose love over finding a person exciting because of their job choices.

Friedrich Nietzsche. I have never met anyone who would understand this! Not necessarily gold diggers but want an equal levels of achievement. Gold diggers do nothing and want everything. Independent women do everything and want nothing from their men. If a man has no aspirations, where will he be in life, what will he want, what successes will he strive for beyond financial.

Worldy and ambitious men are kind too, they just have less energy and time for you if they spend most of it at work. On the surface he seems super nice, we seem to like some of the same things, etc, but from our conversations it seems that he would like to spend his time doing what he enjoys and not take a job that he would not be happy doing at his age we are both over I think it might fall under the category of having different values and it could be a real deal breaker for me.

I am 39, and just broke up with a lovely guy who made me feel loved and happy. Sadly he was not very ambitious, and did not bring out the best in me. I felt irritated, wanting to change him. Felt that we talk different language. I decided to break it off after 4 months with a heavy heart.

Maybe, I will regret, but took the risk, he does not deserve someone who criticises him all the time…. Still a bit sad…Martina. I fully understand, sometimes you have to take the risk! If not hoe will you ever know. Martina, I hope you are ok, I have to ask do you regret breaking it off?

I am in exactly the same position now with a. Wry good man, with no ambition deciding if I can move forward or not. It would be good to hear from someone who has been through it. He is such an amazing guy with so much potential, it hurts.

I hope your broken heart heals soon and you find the someone more compatible. With a 4 yr. She writes they are compatible on many levels, but obviously not on this one and it would seem as they both get older, this level is becomming more and more important to her. Kinda sad all the way around. Hey, wait a minute…I thought love conquers all?

Guess not. Like Evan said, no guy can fulfill all your needs, and it seems that is what CJ is looking for. And we do have to compromise all the time.

I think she has a pretty good deal going with this guy, but has she told him how she feels? Most guys need a little nudging in that area. Maybe CJ is putting too much emphasis on somehting that may seem important now but may not be in the long run.

You would like to be able to hold down a conversation with your partner and if your time together goes on with awkward silences when you are out of bed, you are going to have a hard time in a LTR. And as Evan is saying compatibility is important. This is precisely a compatibility issue. Of course she should be acceptiing of him as he is but she can introduce him to her perspective and find a common place.

But I can talk to my business coach about my business, I can talk to my best guy friend about philosophy, and I can experience my own creativity and others creativity in other forms. Be aware that neither of you are going to change in this regard. The question you have ask yourself is if the lack of desired qualities in your BF are enough for you to go find someone else.

Can you be happy for the next 40 years living without those qualities in a husband? I think there is a lot of insight to be had from asking why has a woman who describes herself as a go-getter stayed with such a man for 10 years, even going back to him after a 4 year break.

As Evan wrote, their are guys with more ambition and intellectual drives who have the qualities you want and an intelligent woman like you already knows that. I think once you examine these questions you will feel more strongly about staying or going which will help you make a decision.

I would have to throw my lot in with Selena on this one. Although I think Evan makes a great point about women compartmentalizing a little more, you really have to figure out what is non-negotiable for you. Is she going to be comfortable being a mistress or being rejected when she finds a her ideal? Would her old boyfriend take her back? Would she be alone forever?

Would being alone make her happier? Would she just be in the chase her whole life? Would she just style with someone else that is potentially a worse person than her boyfriend? If she can answer all of that, then she can make a decision.

After this length of time, you know exactly who he is and what he has to offer as a human being and yet you are chronically dissatisfied, which he has to know at least intuitively, and which surely must hurt him deeply. You keep yo-yo-ing back and forth, dancing in and out of the relationship, and he takes you back every time. You want HIM to change — be different improve, in your eyes be more like you.

We should either love our mates the way they are or move on. If you do stick around will you really be able to love him unconditionally, as Evan urges? How sad. How downright cruel. Instead, he prefers to have fun and balance in his life.

For Better or for Worse – How to Help Your Partner Through Job Hunts

Here are some steps to consider taking whether you're searching for a job, need gig work quickly or have been asked to work from home. Many employers are hiring now to fill urgent talent needs. Here's our list of companies hiring now.

Should your spouse's or partner's opinion influence your job search? One job hunter who lost his job and went through what he calls 'various stages of mourning', says yes.

When one half of a couple is out of work, it requires extra effort from both to keep the household on the move. While the burden of unemployment is certainly stressful for the person who has lost a job, it also represents huge new responsibilities for a spouse who still has a job. One of the biggest is bringing home a paycheck while supporting your partner in the search for a new job. This role requires patience, a positive attitude and flexibility — as well as generosity with your network.

How To Support Your Man During His Extended Job Search

Recently, my colleagues had a discussion about a trend in couples that we have observed where one partner refuses to get a job to support the household or have a stable employment. Here are some reasons why people choose to stay with a partner who refuses to work. Even though you may start to feel a lot of hurt, anger, and resentment towards your partner, ultimately you stay in the relationship because you are getting something out of it. You have to be honest with yourself and explore what that is. Basically, there is some level of comfort to an unhealthy relationship, because it is familiar and predictable thus fear of the unknown. And even if your partner is not there for you emotionally, you may take pride in the fact that you actually have a partner which is more appealing to you than dare I say being alone. I am too old to start over. No one else is going to want me.

How to Support Your Husband during His Job Search

Christina, 29, has been with her serious boyfriend for several years. Whenever they go anywhere, she now pays for them both. This could go one of two ways: It could be the catalyst for your breakup, or it could be the first major challenge that you and your boyfriend get through together. Neither will be fun or sexy. Of course, you need to be very strategic about this.

Losing your job is tough, especially if it happens suddenly. But what if it's your partner who has lost their job — how can you support them?

Amelia Shroyer moved to Berlin in to be with her then-boyfriend, Nic. Nic worked full-time and made good money, but she found it hard to be unemployed. He celebrated every step of my progress, from a recruiter's first reply to a successful interview.

10 Ways To Cope With A Partner That Can’t Find A Good Job

When I was a newlywed, I had a front-row seat to the tough career decisions couples I knew were making. One friend had a tough decision to make. Each desperately wanted to settle near their own family and long-time friends, but the two cities were miles apart. They chose his.

After relationship problems, joblessness is the one thing most likely to push a man into a serious depression, according to the Royal College of Psychiatrists. If your man has been out of work for a while, nagging him to find a job will be unlikely to lift his mood or motivate him. Instead of complaining, think about what you can do to help. Sticking to a schedule could help your man avoid the depression that often comes with being unemployed. Getting up at a decent time every day to start his job search will keep your partner in a work-like routine.

How To Support Your Partner If They Lose Their Job

How can you help your partner cope? For starters, you need to listen. Show engagement and empathize. Figure out what they need from you. Sometimes they may just want to vent; other times they may need your advice. Or do you just want to be heard? If you get a sense that your partner is misreading a situation at the office or is stuck in a rut, ask questions to broaden their perspective. Stress endurance is not a competition.

Jun 13, - One of the biggest responsibilities of a spouse who is bringing home a paycheck while a wife or husband cannot find a job is supporting your.

A lengthy unemployment due to layoffs or career changes may make your Mr. Right seem less perfect, especially if he lacks the ambition to find a new job. Financially supporting your boyfriend can hinder the relationship and lead to negative feelings like anger and frustration. You can't force your boyfriend to find a job but you can encourage his search. Don't resort to threats or guilt tactics but be firm in your resolve and supportive of his genuine efforts.

Helping boyfriend make job connections

Unfortunately, these days dealing with a partner who is out of work is quite a common experience. Unemployment is a stressful situation, not only for the person experiencing it, but for their partners as well. There is no question that employment in a relationship brings money problems, stress and a lot of other difficult-to-navigate feelings, so how can you support a partner who is going through this in the right way? First, reach out to everyone you know when helping your partner find a new job.

According to a Pew Study published in , nearly 40 percent of women with children under 18 were the sole or primary earners in their family in based on U. Census Bureau data. An income gap can cause tension in a relationship especially when a partner is struggling to locate a job.

Supporting a husband during unemployment can be stressful.




Comments: 1
  1. Tull

    You are absolutely right. In it something is also to me it seems it is very good thought. Completely with you I will agree.

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